a spot of blue

It has been one year, two months, and fourteen days since my 4 legged-best friend died. Not a single day goes by that I don't think of her... There are still polaroids of her on my mirror, there is still a silly 101 Dalmatians figurine sitting on my shelf (and it's not because I love the movie, in fact, I can't even bring myself to watch it), there is still our framed picture of us lying on the floor, and she's still the background on my phone. I don't think I'll ever be able to change it. Honestly though. That would just be another step to leaving her behind.

I am sitting here crying wondering if this is normal? Is there some other reason for my tears? Really though, if I thought about it enough other days, I could cry then too. I've never had very good luck with friends... I don't easily let go of my walls with others. I don't share a lot of things and to the people I have, more often than not, I have been let down. Spot was my refuge. She was one soul that I could go to anytime and she would just be there. It was weird, she was my in doggy form. I know I sound kooky, but I can't help it. I remember one of the very first days after we found her on Valentines day, I went outside and laid down beside her and accidently fell asleep. She was still lost at this point, but I like to think I made her feel welcome to our home.. to her new home. When she came into the house for the first time, we told her to go get into bed and she ran straight into my room and hopped onto my bed and it was there that she slept for the next 10 years. I think this is the first time that I have really thought about it since she died and it is literally making me sick to my stomach. I can't really describe how much she meant to me but I felt like I just needed to get it out. It makes me sad that God didn't give animals souls. Maybe she was reincarnated into another puppy and I'll meet her again someday... I am happy though that she made it till my birthday. That was her gift to me. The next day is when she had to go... My sister, my spot. I love you.

Crazy Little Thing Called Love.

I cannot fully explain my love of fashion. There is just something about a great pair of Christian Louboutin's or this seasons "oh so desirable" Balmain strong shoulder jackets or even the simple tees by Elizabeth and James. I literally get the chills just thinking about them. I don't know where this obsession came from but I cannot contain it and I know that my future will somehow be involved in the labyrinth that is the world of fashion...

So, I am starting this blog because I have too many outfits running around in my head and no one to show them to. Also, I feel that if I know my outfit will be viewed by any number of people, it will motivate me to put on something other than jeans and a tee (oh how I love my James Jeans and flannel!). My outfits won't be full of designer pieces because, aside from my shoes, I don't really own any amazing designer pieces. Nevertheless I have clothes that I love and want to share. I hope you enjoy and I hope I actually keep up with the posting!

In more exciting news:

I just bought a new pair of Yves Saint Laurent ankle strap pumps and I am in love with them; Possibly more than any other pair of shoes I own! I'd like to consider them a birthday present, for I did see them on a lovely lady at Nobu in London on my birthday. I have been unable to forget them since then and I knew I had to have them. Unfortunately, I don't have anywhere to wear them but I'm working on that. Pictures coming soon!